Aftereffects of A Stroke: A Sense of Great Loss.

 (All of my posts are free to be copied and used in any way.)

My husband said to me last night, “I’ve lost myself.” I said, “No, you’ve lost some of yourself, but not all. You are just the same as you always were, you just have to do things and think things slower. Your character and who you are as a person is the same.”

“Really?” he said. I don’t feel the same.” I asked him in what way. He said, “When I went to the hospital today for my cancer treatment, (he has carcinoid tumors) I felt different around the nurses who know me. I couldn’t talk as much and joke with them as I always have in the past.”

I told him I was sorry he felt that way. I told him I believed he would get stronger physically and mentally. The doctors just said it would take a long time. I hope that helped him a bit. I told him I was glad he was sharing about his feelings, something he rarely did before.

His head has been hurting more, but I think it is because of the cancer treatment and the time it took to get him ready to go there. I also think he was embarrassed to be seen in a wheelchair being pushed by my granddaughter.

My husband has always thought of himself as a strong man, which indeed is how all the family sees him. He was not only physically strong; he was strong mentally. He stuck with me through my mental breakdowns. He tried to lift my spirits and never seemed discouraged by my disabilities. He many times said the wrong thing in trying to make me feel better, because he isn’t a psychologist, but I understood that.

Now he sees himself as weak. He worries if I leave the door unlocked, he can’t protect me. He worries I might fall and get hurt (I have a balance problem. One time I fell into the Christmas tree. Lol). He didn’t used to worry so much, but I guess he sees how fragile life is and how quickly things can go wrong.

I’ve always known that. In fact, I’m surprised and thrilled when things go right. I tend to look at the dark side of life because of my childhood abuse. My husband was abused too, in a different way, but he took that experience and told himself he would be strong and then he would be okay. He told himself that if someone didn’t like him, “It’s their loss and my gain.” Lol.

He was really surprised about having a stroke. I wasn’t because we are both old, 69 and 70. I’m surprised I don’t have diabetes, high blood pressure and a bad heart! But my husband was incredibly optimistic about everything. Overly optimistic, I thought.

He woke up this morning and seemed more cheerful. I told him we need to do some mind games, so we started a puzzle. He didn’t last long until his head started hurting and he wanted to stop. I am going to phone his Occupational Therapist on Monday and ask how hard I should push him. They used to push hard at the hospital, so I have to understand this part of his recovery.

The low-salt diet is going very well. It turned out at first it was going too well. His blood pressure started to drop down to the 90s. Apparently, 120 is ideal. So, I started letting him have a bit more salt in his diet and it is now between 100 to 123. I found a recipe for tomato sauce that is low-salt and he loved the taste. I didn’t like it at first, but after sitting a night in the fridge, it was pretty good.

No more fast-food. Pretty well all of it has tons of salt. One meal is more than enough salt for a day. I found out the salad I usually ordered had more salt than a hamburger! I usually hate cooking and we used to order in a lot, but I have found, with God’s assistance, I don’t mind the cooking and it is going very well.

This is just an update of my husband’s stroke. I thought it might help those who live with and take care of someone who has had a stroke. Thanks again for your concern and prayers. God is here with us helping, comforting and strengthening us. May God be beside all of you doing the same.

14 thoughts on “Aftereffects of A Stroke: A Sense of Great Loss.

  1. I reckon it impossible for the believer to be overly optimistic:
    “Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,” – Ephesians 3:20

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  2. Dear heavenly father, tonight again I lift up this family for I know cancer is horrible and a stroke is not fun either but father I know you know what is happening in this gentleman‘s life. I pray that he can do all three things with you who strengthen him Philippians 413 I pray father that tonight you lay hands over this gentleman and his wife to feel the peace that no one else could feel that only you could give that you protect and humble your hands over this family father. I pray tonight that no matter what is going on but no weapon shall form against this gentleman and his wife father I also pray that your will be done please father no suffering no pain no hurt no harm I know father that you are the Almighty healer so I asked tonight again you put a hedge of protection over this family. Father I pray that as this world is horrible and we have sickness and disease that you will make sickness and disease leave his body. For this family feels that they are old 69 and 70 but father that’s still is young that’s still his young. I pray father that you give them more time here on earth with their family for I know they do believe but please father give them more time here on earth I pray father that tonight as I am saying these words they feel the warmth of you helping them through it all that you were there no matter what father and as we do not know what tomorrow brings and only you do we know that your will will be done but father for life is so great and we know we have everlasting we pray I pray that you heal and help this family through all sickness and disease again you are the Almighty you are the healer you are the one who knows how and when and why we go through some thing. I just ask again father that you are the great physician and you bring comfort comfort to this family we love you we know that we can do nothing without your strength and we ask for that tonight father we ask for your comfort through it all father in Jesus name I pray amen please forgive my mistakes for I have dictated it into my phone for I am blind and that’s OK but I need you to know that I’m praying for you thinking of you and sending love my way got an is an amazing God so tonight and every night I will keep you and your husband and family in my prayers I know he is working no matter what the outcome and circumstances are. Your friend via word press Teresa

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    1. Thank you so much, Teresa. This prayer is so kind of you and we appreciate it. Tonight, my husband is feeling much better and can watch TV. It isn’t giving him a bad headache today. I’m thankful to God for this because doing anything makes his head hurt and he seemed discouraged last night. How blessed we are to know God hears our prayers. I like the verse, “I love the Lord because he hears my voice.” I mean, when someone listens to us it means so much. It means they truly care. And to think the God who made the universe, all the nebulae and stars, hears me when I speak to him. It is amazing! And yes! He is always working. I heard Joyce Meyer, a woman evangelist, say that and I have kept that in my heart, “God is working.” May the Lord bless and keep you, Teresa.

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      1. I just pray that God blesses you keeps you in perfect harmony with his word and what he has for you in your life I will be praying diligently for you and your family and I’m so grateful to hear he’s doing better tonight🙏

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          1. Thank you so very much exclaim I greatly appreciate it at this time I need all the prayers I can get as well. God is faithful he is good he will never leave or for sake you I know this for sure so I hold onto my God because he’s my best friend during the hardest times during the good times he’s my source in my resource so I thank you for praying for me as well please please please! Keep me in the loop on what’s going on with your family because I am praying I pray all the best for you no matter what the struggles maybe life will always be hard because God never promised an easy life on earth but just know we have eternity with him in heaven have a blessed and wonderful day 😍


          2. Hey beautiful thank you for praying for me as well. I hope you don’t mind I posted your blog on my page and asking for others to pray for you and your family I hope you enjoy what I’ve written but more so I just want to head your protection over you and your family and prayer prayer for you and your beautiful husband have a wonderful and blessed day may God bless you always

            Liked by 1 person

            1. I have looked for your page but it comes up that you have moved and page not found. I don’t read other blogs because of my eyes. I have double vision and wear special prism glasses. my eyes get tired and sore if I read my tablet or too many words on our computer. I can play games online, but not read too much. Still, I would like to read one of your posts. And thank you again for your prayers and the prayers of your friends. How blessed we are God hears our smallest sigh.


                That should take you there that is my web address I don’t know why it’s not coming up on word press but my page is struggling bless but not alone on the journey but my URL or my website page is WWW Teresa Dash blessings dart blog hopefully you find it that way another thing is I am blind and can’t read with my site so you may want to look into software programs like Zoom text or a program by the name of Jaws to help you on the computer please feel free to email me and we can talk about different ways to get you to see better are use all types of technology because of my vision loss


              1. My email address is TMG if you want more help with maybe programs for the blind or visually impaired I gladly help you as much as I can really there’s a website called freedom scientific which would be able to guide you in whatever you need but feel free to email me anytime


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