The Black Cloud of Depression.

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I thought I’d revisit the topic of depression, since I am so closely acquainted with it. I’d been feeling happy for many months, then depression hit again. Every morning. Again. I knew it might be caused by my youngest daughter and my granddaughter leaving to live in Canmore. But I didn’t see why this sadness was lasting so long.

After a few weeks of this, I asked God about it. Before this, I had just been asking for help and quoting Scripture. That wasn’t working this time. I realized when I asked God why this was happening and why nothing was working, I should have asked him many days ago. Because God always answers my questions. Sometimes he answers right away; sometimes in days. So, I waited for an answer and kept my eyes open.

I believe I got an answer the next day. The answer came through Christian books I was reading, podcasts by Annie F. Downs, and Joyce Meyer on TV. She was the one who showed me how important it is to quote Scripture out loud. There is power in that. Evil spirits don’t stay around when the Word of God is quoted.

That morning, Joyce was speaking about depression. This is what I learned.

  1. Believe God loves me. Not an easy one for me, although it is getting easier.
  2. Write in a notebook every time God does something for me, be grateful and thank Him. I do thank him many times, but not daily and I don’t write it down. I thought of all the things he has done lately for my family, really important things, and felt better.
  3. Believe God is working. Now I’d heard this from Joyce a few years ago and it changed the way I felt about my family. I used to worry about them and I would say this to myself, I did believe it and this brought peace. But I never used this phrase to help myself – to really believe God was working for me every day. To believe that actually helps me believe he loves me.
  4. Don’t get discouraged because you have to learn and remember spiritual truths over and over. This is a big one for me, and it was by listening to interviews on Annie F. Downs’ podcast where I found a lot of Christians have found this to be true in their lives. I used to wonder, when I would learn something new that helped me, why didn’t it stick with me? Why would I keep forgetting? Why was I so dense?

Apparently, I’m not alone in this. And I suppose that is why we must read Scripture every day. I’ve decided this will not make me feel bad about myself. God’s ways are so much higher and so different from our ways, it takes a lifetime to learn them. And I am thankful God is super patient.

Thus, after a full day of searching for God’s answer, I believe I have found it in these four ways of living and thinking. I don’t feel depressed today, I feel blessed. Not that I am supposed to rely on my feelings, but it is truly lovely not to feel a dark cloud circling my head.

5 thoughts on “The Black Cloud of Depression.

  1. Positive thinking is definitely a must when it comes to fighting discouragement and depression. I found this idea on Facebook at the beginning of 2017 and did it. The idea was to have a “blessings jar” that you put a blessing in each week. On Wednesday or Thursday of each week, I would put in my blessing for that week. Sometimes, it would be a scripture that was on my heart. Sometimes, it would be a way that God provided for my family. One of the blessings that year was finding out I was pregnant! The idea is to go back through all the blessings on December 31 and think back at what God has done! Doing this each week forced me to think of something good that happened that week. Some weeks were much harder than others BUT God always allows something good to happen in our lives even during the storms. That is part of His grace. We just have to purpose to find it and dwell on it. ❤

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